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Minutes to Madness, #1
May. 16th, 2017 12:21 amWhen I was 20 or so, a friend and I ran elections and took over the honors society at the local university. I promptly flunked out of the honors program (hey, 2 years is a decent run considering I was on academic probation the whole time), but not before writing 10-20 sets of weird minutes. I feel they should be cataloged here for posterity. Sorry about the formatting, but I don't actually care?
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"Veronica needed to leave really badly, but she couldn’t, because we’re slow as molasses in a month of Sundays in winter walking to school uphill both ways with no shoes and no toilet paper and in diapers randomly attached to limbs in order to craft a snow-suit and combat the wicked winter wonderland and Funion-breath (munch)."
Sept. 19, 2002 General Meeting Minutes
Jesse Dylan Watson (secretary)
Attendance
In attendance, surprisingly, was the entire advisory board, except for Chrystal Ruby (and I’m sure she would have been there had the rest of us somehow, mercifully, failed to show up). Heading up the pack of “can it really be him, or is it just a mirage??” sightings was Joseph Brewer. Also present: Courtney and Krista from the “when in the hell do I graduate?” squad. It was also nice (and in some cases not so nice) to meet many of the freshmen and freshwomen (although I admit the women were a bit fresher than the men—it’s just a particular of the gender, methinks). Attending were Krista Friesen (not to be confused with Krista Doubek, the true jock-strap of the organization, above), the biology guy with the poofy hair who refuses to date me (Drew Henry), Holly Ames (who Joe seemed to fancy), and Zach Grant (the scary art major my girlfriend had a lot to say about—all, ahem, good things, of course). There may have been others present who weren’t able to get a writing utensil to properly put a check beside their name.
( WALL O' TEXT, CON'T. )
__________________________
"Veronica needed to leave really badly, but she couldn’t, because we’re slow as molasses in a month of Sundays in winter walking to school uphill both ways with no shoes and no toilet paper and in diapers randomly attached to limbs in order to craft a snow-suit and combat the wicked winter wonderland and Funion-breath (munch)."
Sept. 19, 2002 General Meeting Minutes
Jesse Dylan Watson (secretary)
Attendance
In attendance, surprisingly, was the entire advisory board, except for Chrystal Ruby (and I’m sure she would have been there had the rest of us somehow, mercifully, failed to show up). Heading up the pack of “can it really be him, or is it just a mirage??” sightings was Joseph Brewer. Also present: Courtney and Krista from the “when in the hell do I graduate?” squad. It was also nice (and in some cases not so nice) to meet many of the freshmen and freshwomen (although I admit the women were a bit fresher than the men—it’s just a particular of the gender, methinks). Attending were Krista Friesen (not to be confused with Krista Doubek, the true jock-strap of the organization, above), the biology guy with the poofy hair who refuses to date me (Drew Henry), Holly Ames (who Joe seemed to fancy), and Zach Grant (the scary art major my girlfriend had a lot to say about—all, ahem, good things, of course). There may have been others present who weren’t able to get a writing utensil to properly put a check beside their name.
( WALL O' TEXT, CON'T. )