(no subject)

Hello from the plane, where I've been listening to the saddest music I can think of, stuff about loss that I was afraid to listen to when I was with Mary because I didn't want it to come true. But it came true, so now I'm listening to it while my coworker sleeps beside me, staring out the window, fighting back the tears I always wish would come, but now I won't let them because I'm in public. Sometimes I wish I had a band, a really good one that somehow magically just followed my every musical thought, so I could just sing until my vocal cords no longer worked and cry and yell. People call that art (I do anyway).

"I know someday you'll have a beautiful life; I know you'll be a star in somebody else's sky, but why, why, why can't it be mine?"

-Pearl Jam, "Black"